Des Années et Des Souvenirs

Today was a surprisingly eventful day, likely to take up a good amount of blog space. I was dreading the day quite a bit, especially after last night when, already having trouble falling asleep despite my exhaustion, i re-remembered exactly what today was. I had known it was coming, I knew it when February 3rd came. Likely two dates I won't forget anytime soon. I suppose I remember the first date so well because it was Caitlin's birthday and we had gone out to dinner at Shout and then to see Ailey that night last year and had the best night ever, until I got dad's call around 11pm and found out about mom's fall. I remember every little detail of that night from crying in the hallway of the 6th floor of woodruff outside rany and katherine's door (and then later in their room w/everyone), to going down to Caitlin's room, disturbing her celebration w/her suitemates, but being so grateful that she was there for me...the whole night....and watching Clueless, a movie that i'll never be able to watch again. And then today, Feb 12, perhaps the less traumatic of the two since i knew what was coming, but nevertheless the one I'll remember more.
I've said so many prayers the last couple days for personal strength, for the strength of my family, in thanksgiving for everything she gave us and brought to our lives, for everything she taught me. I've asked for hope and happiness, two things i've struggled to find the whole year. Today, I got a little bit of both and for that I thank God. I'm remembering things I forgot or lost a year ago...about optimism and taking stock of and joy in the little things, little accomplishments, little uplifting moments. Today I was able to do that, more than I have been able to any time recently.

My film class this morning, though nothing brilliant, made me appreciate being able to decently understand a french professor! Perhaps I'm lowering my expectations of myself, a good thing to do, but even though I can't say I even understood 75% of what she was saying, I got the basic points she was making, and even if I didn't, I was satisfied with what I understood. I can't expect myself to understand as much as the french students do. I'm realizing that. damn perfectionism tries to bring me down every time, not now though.
Then a little break, and I had my first Medieval Archaeology class at Paris 1, Panthéon-Sorbonne. It was a good class, reasonably interesting, once again I understood enough to take legible notes and be satisfied. I've found I can judge my level of comprehension by how legible my notes are. When I don't understand anything, I scribble illegibly any semblance of what I'm hearing, hoping that people around me won't read what I'm writing and think I'm an idiot. haha. oh insecurities.
Then another break, this would be the low point of my day because I was desperate for a bathroom. and being that this is paris, those are scarce, or come at a cost. So, I tried out the Paris 1 bathrooms, and excuse the gross, disgusting details here, but there was a) no toilet seat, b) no TP c) blood among other things on the toilet and d) the floor was dirty and drenched in who knows what. So I proceeded to my next option, which would be finding a café, forking over the 2 euro for a beverage so that i could use their restroom. Find my café, order my overpriced chocolat chaud (hot chocolate), enter door with "WC" sign...and what do I find? A small room with a hole in the floor and a foot grip on either side. Are you effing kidding me? I'm not expecting some kind of throne, but really, paris, you're not a completely poor city, i know you've heard of a toilet. So yes, they expect you to pee in a hole. That's a skill to learn. Granted they did have TP. Almost got points for that.

Alright, bathroom adventures aside, I went to my TD for the Archaeology class next which was supposed to be a smaller section of the class, but no, there were 60 or so of us in a tiny room and the professor was like, I knowww you're not all supposed to be in here. So she made those of us not on the role (me included in that group) come up, show our student IDs and explain our reason for being there. Fortunately she recognized the name of my program and didnt give me any problems :D. The only problem I had was being at the back of the room and unable to understand when she was explaining our assignments. But I made myself make friends with the girl next to me and asked her to explain it to me afterwards, which she very kindly did :D and I'm happy to report that I don't have to do an oral presentation for the class, my biggest fear. I shudder every time I hear the word "exposé" *ick*

So then the best part of my day, I met up with Sophie and Tori at Tor's dorm for baguette, saucisson (tofu sausage in my case) and wine. Basically the french equivalent of a hot dog, with some ketchup and mustard on there, haha. I'll have to take a picture sometime of the hot dogs they sell here because they're all over the place and they're always wrapped inside a baguette with some cheese melted on the outside, very humorous. So we chatted and I realized how much I'd missed hanging out with them the past couple weeks. We were gonna try out this salsa class, but got there late and the place was packed so we peaced and met up with Lindsay at Frog and Princess for student night. I was just happy to talk with them~ and make some plans to get together more this week~ I get lonely easily, but half the time I'm too lazy to fix that problem, lol :-P

So now that I've officially written an essay on here, I'm going to enjoy a full night of sleep with no class tomorrow!

Oh, and one last happy note, I officially have amazing housing for next semester!!! :D Living with my favorite people again - Kristen, Katie, and Leslie in a fantastic Clairmont 4-bedroom apartment!!! YAY!

Aux Tuileries